Today marks my final final exam of this semester, and (fingers crossed) of my undergraduate career as well. That's right folks, I will be graduating from university come June, if all goes well. I don't think it comes off as too surprising when I say that I've both longed for and dreaded this moment, since most if not all undergraduates harbor such feelings (at least that's my understanding of it). What is surprising, at least to me, is how detached I feel from the whole thing. Maybe it's because I barely got 5 hours of sleep last night, or maybe it's because I've all but busted my brain for the exam (more likely both), but it feels like a strange sense of calmness has come over me. Don't worry though, I'm sure it'll all hit me soon enough. That's the one thing I am certain of right now: all the uncertainties, doubts, and worries I have for the future will follow this calm before the storm.
Looking back, I really can't believe it's been almost 5 years since I graduated from high school. Back then, it was already hard to believe that it's been 5 years since elementary school. Many things have changed then, and many things have changed now. Some for better, some for worse; but all were invaluable to my life experience and personal development...My god, where has the time gone?
Now as in back then I say again: But I don't want to grow up...
If you ask me what I've learned from my time in university, I can tell you I don't remember half the stuff that was taught by my courses. And really, there is no one specific lesson that has stood out for me over these years, but somehow the little bits of wisdom I picked up here and there all apparently added up to shape me into a (hopefully) better person. By now everyone close to me is wondering what's going to happen to me from this point on; my parents especially are worried sick about my future. And to be honest, I don't really have a definite, reassuring answer for them. Heck, I don't even know what I'll be doing 6 months from now. I'm a philosophy major with an interest in writing, so my immediate plans for the future is to look for work as a freelance writer. The industry's not exactly booming right now, but with a little bit of luck, hopefully I'll have my metaphorical foot in the door before long. This is all obviously wishing thinking on my part of course, but one can hope. Like I said, I don't want to grow up just yet, namely because I don't feel like I'm ready for the real world, but I've come to realize that there won't come a point in time when I'll ever truly be ready. The best I can do is go out there and give it my all, and hope it's enough. I still don't want to grow up...but I'm glad it's happening.
WRITING is a very fulfilling activity. I read in a man's blog that there is lots of free-lance writing opportunities available on the net. But I warn you you still need to learn to write. I graduated with two master's and two bachelor's, one in Journalism, and went to work at a local paper. They sat me at the obit desk the first day, and had me write one paragraph obits all day. I'd write one, hand it across the desk to an old AP editor named Joe Gruber. He'd throw it in the trash without comment, and tell me to do it again! I realized I had the right career. I loved writing -- even obits. God bless you. I wish you the best in your future. Susan Fox
ReplyDeleteThank you for your encouraging comments Susan, and I wholeheartedly agree that writing can be very fulfilling. I'm actually most comfortable writing shorter pieces, but maybe that's because I'm kind of a perfectionist and don't hold my own writing in very high regard. Hopefully with enough practice I'll gain the confidence I need to write better and longer works. Cheers!
DeleteI don't think any of us are ready for life. We have to create how we want to celebrate life and how life will celebrate us. Choosing writing as a career is a wonderful choice. My advice is to do it now. Don't settle for a corporate job and think you can chase your dream "someday". Dreams are much harder to achieve if you put them off. Times change. Technology changes. Stuff happens and before you know it you wonder where the time has gone. Start by setting your goals, then take the steps to get there. The long way around may end up biting you in the keister. I say, go for it!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the advice Shauna. It's always been my plan to pursue writing right after graduation, but at the same time I fear that I'll need a steady source of income if that doesn't work out; it's the classic intrinsic vs extrinsic values debate when choosing a career. Still, I'm going to give it a shot and see where life takes me. Have a nice day!
DeleteBest of luck to you! And, you'll probably pursue many paths from this point on, rather than just one. Life has a way of taking such unexpected twists and turns, but that's what makes it interesting. Again, best of luck!
ReplyDeleteThank you Kelly! I'm sure my career path with diverge from here on out, but hopefully not too much. I've spent my high school and post-secondary years trying to figure out what I want to do and I'm not sure I want to be doing a lot more of that. Still, I'll do my best to take life head on; twists and turns included!
Delete